So I just watched the movie Wanted… And I didn’t have high expectations, but it’s useful to have something fast and simple to watch while I work out because my rowing machine’s just not the most interesting thing.
However, I increasingly was thinking ‘there’s no way my editor would let me get away with this’ and can’t even be bothered to watch the end. (I don’t think the following is really a spoiler, but either way it wouldn’t be stealing movie magic from your life) The firing bullets in a curve thing, I don’t care about. It looks silly but there you go, it’s hollywood. However, the underlying premise is that of a fraternity of assassins keeping the world in balance. Thus far, dumb but I don’t care. it’s where they get their orders from that’s really special… from fate. Yes, the abstract concept is sending them messages, encoded messages. Not via voices from the sky or anything like that, but in binary via errors woven into pieces of cloth.
At this point, I’m getting a little distracted. Do they mean God, for example? What sort of algorithms does fate run and how does it make the decision to inform people? How did it decide to inform people this way in the first place? What happened before the loom was invented? HOW DID THEY CRACK THE CODE IN THE FIRST PLACE? actually, how did they even realise there was a message hidden in the tiny weaves of cloth? Who was inspecting it so carefully around the time of the Norman invasion? And Who believed the crazy person when they said they were getting messages from a fucking inanimate machine?
And then my hour ended and I decided to rant for a minute of LJ and forget I’d ever seen the movie. There was nothing of value in it beyond Angelina Jolie’s tattooed naked back, and by back I mean the bit above where I was looking, so hopefully my brain will delete the useless memories and use the storage space for something more valuable, like the fact I need to buy more garlic for supper.